Today, in my teenage angst, I went dumpster diving. Well, it wasn’t exactly ‘dumpster’ diving. It was more like ‘recycling receptacle’ diving. But truly the only difference between the ‘dumpster’ and the ‘recycling receptacle’ is the color. And, you know, it’s contents. So.
Everything started with my laziness – as it does. I let my recycling pile up and didn’t take it down the back stairs and to the receptacle as I should have. So this morning as I loaded up a large reusable bag I felt good that I was finally getting this refuse out of the way. I had several other bags on my person and didn’t want to take the time to put them down, so I attempted to empty the overly fully bag into the bin with one hand. This turned out to be a huge mistake, as the bag was too full to simply empty. The weight of the recyclables, pulled the bag right out of my hand and into the largely empty bin. Dammit.
So I was left with two options. Leave the bag, or dive for it. This wasn’t a hard decision, as I’d just purchased the bag (with the help of one Anika Creech), and besides that, it didn’t meet the criteria for recyclable materials. I had to go in and get it. I put my bags down – the initial action that might have saved me this morning activity – and climbed up the side of the bin. I am not a very long individual, so as I reached in, bent in half over the edge, I discovered I couldn’t reach it. Though I’m not long, I like to think of myself as pretty scrappy. I searched my other bags for something that could hook the strap of the bag, lifting it into my reach. I found a banana. Blessed bananas!!! Climbing back up the side of the bin, and bending again in half, I reached in with banana in hand.
I emptied my bag and carried on my way, unnecessarily proud of my accomplishment. My vanity is astonishing sometimes. No one should be that proud of a successful dumpster dive.
OKAY! So. A new episode is coming!!! We shot a bunch of awesomeness this week, and you can start getting excited now. Up next? Canadian Winter Survival! Lols for days at this one. Lols for days.
PS. Watch this sort of related clip re: Dumpster Diving. It’s so endearing, and perfectly captures the brilliance of Carrie and Fred’s comedy.