has this summer almost slipped away?
and here i am so uninspired. so fraught with thought but no filled cup to pour from.
this long work and knocking (being a door-to-door salesman for Clark Pest Control) has bled me dry of the kind of mental-emotional energy that it takes to write, sing, draw, blog, record, edit, etc.
usually i’m on many projects at once. now i’m a single-minded man, weary at the day’s end.
My sleep is all broken, and i can’t remember not waking up in the middle of the night.
is it stress? i feel stressed in sleep, stressed thinking i’ll get phone calls of sales cancellations or something.
I’m typing now, because it’s the weekend, and there was some rest in the day, and now some juice in the box, but not much.
going to a church in Rocklin tomorrow.. wonder what it will be like. i don’t expect much. maybe i’m super realist, or just smart enough to doubt great things happening, or just blah.
i guess i feel kind of blah.
but it’s blah that’s under control.
does that make sense? i mean i use it, or choose it, rather. I choose the task that is most important at the moment to spend the energy on, and push other stuff aside.
well, i try to, at a least.
i wonder if this is important… or just blah.
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