A wife to praise and a child to adore, both to be thankful and praise God for.
I’ve been staying mostly away from Facebook and other connectivity this last week (mostly) and have enjoying some needed time-off celebrating my Anniversary with Amy Rae Creech, and today, fatherhood of lil Anika Rae, who makes me laugh aloud at any thought of her.
Three Years of Amy Creech. It’s odd that it’s only been 3 years. I know we’ve done a lot in that time, ranging from starting my own business and traveling across the country a few times, having a baby and buying a house, to my returning to Briercrest as a Vice-President. But that’s not just it. I’ve known Amy since 2003-ish and our epic tale of love, heartbreak, and life began with our dating in 2004. I’ve seen her grow quite a bit from the teenage heartbreaker she was at first. I’ve known her family as close friends for a decade and they somehow know me. I’m not the easiest shell to crack, despite all the talk that falls so quickly from my mouth.
Being known is everything healthy love has to offer. Feels true if it’s not.
Nearly two-years of daddy-hood and my lil Anika crazy running girl.
Comedian and star Mike Myers is quoted to have said of fatherhood,
[quote]Having a kid is like falling in love for the first time when you’re 12, but every day.[/quote]
Not sure if he really said it, but I know it’s true of my short experience.
Steve Jobs and author Elizabeth Stone both have said a quote that’s to another truth I can’t ignore.
here’s her version:
[quote]Making the decision to have a child is momentous. It is to decide forever to have your heart go walking around outside your body.[/quote]
I’ve got no idea how to be a dad. Anyone who really knows me knows that I prefer to learn everything I can about something before trying it out myself. With Fatherhood, I couldn’t. It’s just a dive off the cliff for me.
Why did I do it?
To answer that I think you really need understand something that I don’t hear loud enough on the lips of the world. It’s that parenting has everything to do with being a good spouse to each other. You can’t “focus on the kids” and be a good parent. Is that controversial? To me, it’s obvious. Loving your partner well allows you both the space and emotional stability and support to parent well.
Amy is the reason I dove off the cliff to fatherhood.
If Amy wasn’t a praiseworthy woman full of a kind of stable and tender love I sorely needed, I’d have run from fatherhood. So much depending upon your partner. I shudder at the task of being a single-parent (as my mom was) when I think on this. I’m not saying singles can’t be good parents. I’m saying that parenting is made for two and a few. It’s a family thing, with a spouse to balance ourselves and uncle and aunts and nanna and gramps to pitch in, and when it’s less than that… it’s less. The single parent isn’t less of a parent, they are more, to make up for the loss. But there is a loss, and that’s why it’s hard and sad and why I admire single parents toughing it out so much.
Maybe it’s just more personal. I couldn’t and wouldn’t do it alone. I needed Amy. Everything she is, is why I dove off the cliff when I was (and still am) scared of everything I don’t know about fatherhood. It’s her love and her scooting me off to bed (and now trying to scoot me off to church) and her manners and her heart.
Right now, as Amy tells me to hurry up and get ready for church (that starts in 6 minutes) and as Anika bounces off the walls between asking for a “show” and a “knack” (snack), I can’t help but smirk. This is overwhelming and maybe that’s the real point.
We need others to help us rise to the occasion and I’m so thankful for my Amy.